


Gone

by DifferenceEngineGirl



Series: Frank [3]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Cemetery, Gen, Monologue, Post-Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-09 15:47:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19479046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DifferenceEngineGirl/pseuds/DifferenceEngineGirl
Summary: After Lucifer returned to Hell, Chloe found herself unable to talk about how she felt with her friends, and sought out the one person who could be guaranteed not to judge.





	Gone

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by the wonderful Maimat!
> 
> I initially intended to write and publish these fics in order of where they'd fit in canon, but this one wouldn't leave me alone, so I think the rest will be posted in whatever order I write them.

It was early evening when Chloe approached the stone. It had taken her a little while to locate it, and longer to actually find the time to make the trip. Now she was here, she didn't know how to begin.

"Um, hello Father," she began, stood awkwardly in front of it, and feeling a little self conscious, "Lucifer said he came to talk about things with you when he just needed someone to listen, and I could really do with that right now. It's about Lucifer. He's- He's gone."

She sat down with a sigh, the words beginning to pour out now she'd started.

"He's gone back to Hell, and I hate him for it. Every time we get close to a- a relationship, something happens to keep us apart, and I hate it. We kiss, and he runs off to Vegas; we kiss again, and one of our friends is murdered by our boss, and then I have the  _ worst _ reaction to learning the truth and run off to the Vatican for a month  _ and _ agree to help send him back to Hell. And then I tell him I love him, and he near as anything says he does too, we kiss again, and now he's gone." 

She broke off for a moment, voice sticking in her throat as she blinked back tears.

"And I hate it, I hate him for being so damn selfless, but if I'm being truthful, it's not him I hate. I hate his Dad for making Hell his responsibility in the first place, I hate the demons for going after Charlie and making him go back, I hate Eve for summoning them here, I hate Kinley for bringing that stupid prophecy into our lives, and I- I hate myself for ever siding with him. Linda would tell me that it's not my fault, but I can't help but think that if I had only talked to him instead of fleeing, or pulled my head out of my ass earlier, this wouldn't have happened. Or even if it still did, we might have had some time together before he went."

She sniffed, and wiped away some of the tears she hadn't noticed start flowing down her cheeks with a shaking hand.

"I miss him so much, and there's no one I can really talk to about it. Maze doesn't do feelings, and she's pissed at him for leaving her here. Amenadiel just keeps telling me its for the best. Dan thinks he just abandoned me, and Ella thinks he's just had to go back to England, so I could write or call or text. Linda is the only one close to understanding, but she's got Charlie to look after and I don't want to burden her with my problems. I want to find some way to drag him out of Hell and back to me, but I can't. As much as I know he hates it there, I know why he made that choice, decided to be selfless and sacrifice his own happiness, and if I dragged him out it might undo it all and I can't do that. Part of me wants to be selfish for once in my life, drag him out of Hell and back to my side and never let him leave, but even if I knew how, I couldn't do that."

She lapsed into silence for a while, watching the colors fade from the sky as she wiped her cheeks again.

"I know that the best thing I could do is accept he's probably never coming back and move on, but I don't want to. I want to scream and cry and rage at God and the universe until everything's fixed and he's back here, among the people who love him, where he belongs, but I've got to hold it together. I can't let Trixie see me implode, she's been through enough as it is."

Taking a deep breath, Chloe offered the stone a watery smile.

"I know you probably can't hear me, up in Heaven, but thank you for listening, Frank. It's nice to be able to say all that, and not feel judged. I might come talk again sometime, but for now, goodbye, Father."

She left the graveyard a little lighter than she arrived, still hurting, but without the burden of what she dare not voice to her friends.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback always welcome!


End file.
